Abundance, Spaciousness and the Meaning of Life

This morning, in a bout of spaciousness, I was reading and I was struck — struck with the realization that I don't have enough space. 

Not physical space.

But mental, emotional and energetic space. 

Space to process.
Space to integrate.
Space to ponder and contemplate.

Empty space is the greatest catalyst for cultivating awareness, meaningful thought, and meaningful production.

Awareness, meaningful thought and meaningful production are the most important ingredients for successful and fulfilling work (for ourselves and for the companies that employ us). 

Yet, we so rarely give ourselves enough time or space in emptiness to get to the meaningful bits -- most especially at work. 

We move through our lives filling our time with thing after thing after thing:

Work, chores, alcohol, family, friends, events, projects, kids (and then we fill our kids lives with sports and activities and events and extracurriculars and scheduled play). 

Even in our downtime we move from tv to ipad to phone, from app to app to app, and sometimes all of these, all at the same time. 

We live in the dopamine hit of instant gratification, immediacy, and 'right now'. Not the 'right now' that is the present moment, but the 'right now' of an ever-looming deadline or due date. 

It's funny and ironic that during the moments of holding the most in my life (full-time work, 2 businesses, friends, family, a workout routine, heaps of plans and even travel), I feel the least certain of my contribution to the world.

It is in these moments of life over-saturated where I feel the most confused and lost and desperate for purpose (life purpose, work purpose, meaning, reason to do anything at all). 

Yet, when I am free from holding so much -- when my life is relatively empty by traditional western standards, I can explore interests without needing to monetize or explain.

It is in these moments of spaciousness where I can do things just to do them, without spiraling into an existential crisis or the trade-offs that have to be made when I am holding too much. 

It is in these moments of spaciousness where not only do I produce my most meaningful and impactful work, but I also feel the most whole and content and joyful and at ease.

All of this to say:

Maybe we don't need an abundance of possessions or money or even experiences. 

Maybe we don't need to be in a perpetual grind from thing to thing to thing. 

Maybe what we need is an abundance of time and empty space, simply to allow ourselves to be, and to trust in the process of actual presence with what is in front of us, right now.